"I know that you can do all things
And that no purpose of yours
can be thwarted."
When he woke that morning all better, I remember fearing that it wasn't going to last. And I asked God to make it so. For those four glorious months we rejoiced and rested, not knowing that the true test was to come. And how do you react when your greatest dream realized, is then again taken away? And how do you go on when your best friend holds the hand of physical pain each day, an unwelcome friend? And do I really mean it when I say I wish it were me, not my girls' daddy? At the time I do, but I know no one can go on feeling this way every day and not crumple.
I remember the afternoon 11 years ago when I walked into the room to find the strong half of me laying on the hospital bed. And I ran--the hallway a marathon filmed in slow motion. And the nurse, busy talking, walked slowly to his side. And then the flood--the flood of doctors and voices and shouts and code blues and "Get her out of heres!" and I--hiding in the corner, too busy crying to pray. And I feel that desperation again. In the middle of a movie. In the still of the night. Even in the middle of a noisy hallway. I am there again. And I feel it again. Like death is looming. And the same shock and devastation tastes bad in my mouth. Sickness is a robber...stealing and stripping and ransacking. Until nothing is left except absolute dependence on The Maker of the World. And we are forced to completely surrender our rights, our expectations and even our future.
How do you rise after you fall on your knees in disappointment?
Cry to God.
Seek HIS wisdom.
We are not to go about this world alone.
We are to continue meeting together...praying together...
encouraging one another.